Today I see every previous step of my life as leading to my child. For me, having a baby at the age of forty was not in my Plan A or even Plan B. It was part of the Big pPlan that held mysteries for me I couldn’t see or begin to imagine.
A MYSTERY ROOM for me was discovered while tying my daughter’s shoes on an outdoor basketball court where children had played for decades. When I bent down on my knees, suddenly there was no sound. It was as if everything went blank. The world stopped. I was in an empty vast space. I could only hear the sound of the one shoelace as it overlapped the other. I could also somehow see every detail of the shoelace down to its microscopic, high definition frayed threads, without the aid of my reading glasses. It was as if the universe was breathing for me. My body was assisting my daughter but my spirit had connected into the most benevolent, peaceful place I could ever imagine. I was little again. It’s an experience I may never fully understand and may never have again. But I will never forget it. It was a true mystery.